Opening

I'm grateful for opening at my job.  It gives me the rest of the day to do what I want.  Booyah.

Jeans

You girls know what I'm talking about.  The jeans that you've had for years and just hate to take off because they are so comfortable.

Realization that technology is lame

I'm a loser.  Literally.  I lose way too many things to be even close to being a winner.  I've been a loser all my life.  As you may recall, I lost my camera a while back and miraculously found it 2 months later.  I have a feeling that will not be the case this time.  Yes I lost the camera again, what of it?  Apparently, Clifton is accusing me of leaving it on the bench at the dog park.  There is a 98% chance he may be right.  I mean, he was right about the camera being at Olive Garden last time.  What are the odds he's right again?  Ok ok.  My husband definitely keeps my head on straight so he has to be right.  After searching all the places we went to today we came to the conclusion it was left at the dog park.  I made my first "Lost!" sign in my life.  I'm 22 and I've never made one of those before?  How is that possible in my family?!  That's beside the point.  I hung up my little paper all over the dog park hoping somebody honest took/found my camera.  Yeah right.  

This whole day just made me realize how much I loathe technology.  My computer crashed a few months ago, taking all of my pictures with it.  I am fairly certain I have all my photos either on facebook, my flash drive, the memory card, or the parents computer but I'll really never know.  It's upsetting for me to lose so many precious memories!  So I'm boycotting technology.  I am going to invest in a typewriter, get my photo books made, and live in a tree house like the Swiss Family Robinson.  I already feel so much more productive!

Living Scripture Videos

I got asked to substitute a primary class and it made me realize how grateful I am for the living scriptures videos.  I grew up on these bad boys!  And I still love them and continue to learn.

Gods timing

You know what?  God knows perfectly well what he's doing.

Tolerance

Today a friend and I were talking and he revealed that he did not believe in love.  He said that at first people are just infatuated, and then as the years go on they just tolerate each other.  I was humored by his statement but as I thought about it more and more I realized he was right.  Not about the love.  I believe in love.  I believe that's why me and my husband cry together after resolving a big fight, or why he selflessly takes care of me regardless of whether I'm sick or not.  I think my friend was right about the tolerance.  I think tolerance is love.  You don't tolerate someone unless you care about them.  It's hard sometimes to tolerate people.  Especially for me.  I don't know why but I get sick of people really fast.  If I'm around the same person every day for a week, I begin to loathe them.  It's all in my head but I get very perturbed being around the same people constantly.  The exceptions to this is my family members and Clifton.  Clifton is the ONLY person outside of my siblings that I can bear to be around for very long. That's one of the biggest reasons I knew he and I will always be together.  I'm grateful for tolerance and the people loving enough to tolerate me.  I know that I am a lot to handle.  I don't need much attention and I don't need many clothes and I'm always up for getting dirty.  I'm not high maintenance in that aspect.  I'm high maintenance in the emotions aspect.  And you know what?  It's ok, because my husband enjoys maintaining me.  Don't think I don't take care of him either.  I have learned that I haven't treated Clifton the best, but that has changed.  I am continuously making an effort to jolt him the way he jolts me.  Why?  Because of tolerance.  He's an easy person to tolerate anyway, but even if he wasn't I'd still tolerate him because I love him.

Dog park

You want to know the most brilliant creation ever?  Ok well I was going to make it a picture surprise, but it's all in the title.  We discovered the dog park today and it is seriously ingenious!  We've been wanting to get Scout out to be around dogs but had no idea how or where.  We didn't see any opportunities.  Naturally we were very happy to see this park.  It is so good for dogs to interact with other dogs.  They become less violent, terratorial, and moody.  It is always great exercise for them.  My favorite part, besides the sign of the dog picking up poop, is that we don't have to bring anything but the dog.  There are plenty of chairs, toys, doodoo bags, shovels, trash cans, dogs, and water bowls.  Cool right?

This really is the sign on the fence.  I just find it hilarious.

CLOSE friends.  Actually that dog is the worst, we always leave now whenever we see him.  Little did we know that first day though.

Becky

Beckaboo (beh-kuh-boo) (noun):

       A person of extraordinary responsibility.  She is very intelligent and successful.  She is the oldest sister and I haven't really gotten to know her until the past few years.  She is extremely giving of herself and always puts people before herself.  She is sensitive and kind and is aware of the way people feel.  She sacrifices so much of herself for others without them even knowing.  She is hysterical.  Becky is smart, but she is also gullible because she is so trusting.  Three years ago my parents were going to Moab and me and Becky were the only ones that were able to go.  It was such a fun trip.  Becky also has the best stories.  Always.  No exception.  She tells stories so well, and her expressions just add to them perfectly.  She reminds me of my favorite aunt; Linda.    Becky does what she wants and doesn't let things stop her.  She experiences new things and actually LIVES her life.  She had the opportunity to run the Ragnar Relay this year in Utah and she will be doing it next month.  She has never really run and she still said yes!  She knew it would be a fun adventure.  I freaking love that.  She also is taking an aerial silk class (see picture below).  I went to see her today and it was awesome.  Becky is so brave and it's inspiring to see her just do things without making lame excuses.  I want to be more like her.  I love my older sister so much and am so grateful I've gotten to know her as well as I have.

Holding

Eisley

I know I've been on a big fat Eisley kick the past month or so but they are incredible.  They have the most beautiful voices I've heard; so enchanting.  I have already listened to their new album for hours.  Well since I'm being honest, I haven't stopped listening to them since last night.  Their music sucks me in.  I get lost in the rythms, harmonies, lyrics, and emotions.  I connect with their music.  I wish everyone knew about them, but I also love having this outstanding secret band of mine.  If I ever met them I would cry.  In fact I cried last night when they went on stage.  I was so ecstatic.

Road trips

And now.  The moment you've all been waiting for.


EISLEY.

It's such a beautiful name.  You don't even know!

Today we traveled up to Boise to see them in concert and it was PHENOMENAL!  Ammon was quite hesitant; he hated road trips.  I assure you that is no longer the case.  That's right, we road trip the fun way.  Lots of messing with each other, asking meaningful and meaningless questions, stopping at hilarious gas stations, and taking lots of pictures.  Enjoy!

Yes.  Those are alpacas (llamas) at the sinclair in the middle of nowhere.  Awesome.

They were so soft and plush!

AND we got to feed them!  Soooo cool.

See what I mean?  Messing with each other.  Kari stuffed a twizzler in Ammons nose.

Crazy from the car ride?  Or just crazy...

Worst picture ever.  I wish I had a computer so I could edit the crap out of it.  Actually, I just wish I had a new camera.

We all enjoyed dinner.  Can you tell?

Your vision is correct.  That is a man with a wizard hat and beer can staff.

Once again, no need to check your eyes.  Man with oar crossing the street.

ze birfday girly

And here in Idaho, we like to motivate by beating you up with words.  You hopeless and powerless human.

This is the common area in Boise.  Boise is seriously the cutest!  I loved it there.

Oh hey giant Abe statue in the middle of Boisef.  Sup.

Becky chasing the birds, as usual.  Kari getting ready to pounce on someone and wrestle, also as usual.

Concert happiness.

Look there they are!  There's Eisley :]

Physical and emotional cleanliness

By Gordon B. Hinckley:

We live in a world that is filled with filth and sleaze, a world that reeks of evil. It is all around us. It is on the television screen. It is at the movies. It is in the popular literature. It is on the Internet. You can’t afford to watch it, my dear friends. You cannot afford to let that filthy poison touch you. Stay away from it. Avoid it. You can’t rent videos and watch them as they portray degrading things. You young men who hold the priesthood of God cannot mix this filth with the holy priesthood.

Avoid evil talk. Do not take the name of the Lord in vain. From the thunders of Sinai the finger of the Lord wrote on tablets of stone, “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain” (Ex. 20:7).

It is not a mark of manhood to carelessly use the name of the Almighty or His Beloved Son in a vain and flippant way, as many are prone to do.

Choose your friends carefully. It is they who will lead you in one direction or the other. Everybody wants friends. Everybody needs friends. No one wishes to be without them. But never lose sight of the fact that it is your friends who will lead you along the paths that you will follow.

While you should be friendly with all people, select with great care those whom you wish to have close to you. They will be your safeguards in situations where you may vacillate between choices, and you in turn may save them.

Be clean. Don’t waste your time in destructive entertainment. There was recently held in the Salt Lake Valley a show put on by a traveling band. I am told that it was filthy, that it was lascivious, that it was evil in every respect. The young people of this community had paid $25 to $35 to get in. What did they get for their money? Only a seductive voice urging them to move in the direction of the slimy things of life. I plead with you, my friends, to stay away from such. It will not help you. It can only injure you.

I recently spoke to your mothers and your fathers. Among other things, I talked with them about tattoos.

What creation is more magnificent than the human body? What a wondrous thing it is as the crowning work of the Almighty.

Paul, in writing to the Corinthians, said: “Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?

“If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are” (1 Cor. 3:16–17).

Did you ever think that your body is holy? You are a child of God. Your body is His creation. Would you disfigure that creation with portrayals of people, animals, and words painted into your skin?

I promise you that the time will come, if you have tattoos, that you will regret your actions. They cannot be washed off. They are permanent. Only by an expensive and painful process can they be removed. If you are tattooed, then probably for the remainder of your life you will carry it with you. I believe the time will come when it will be an embarrassment to you. Avoid it. We, as your Brethren who love you, plead with you not to become so disrespectful of the body which the Lord has given you.

May I mention earrings and rings placed in other parts of the body. These are not manly. They are not attractive. You young men look better without them, and I believe you will feel better without them. As for the young women, you do not need to drape rings up and down your ears. One modest pair of earrings is sufficient.

I mention these things because again they concern your bodies.

How truly beautiful is a well-groomed young woman who is clean in body and mind. She is a daughter of God in whom her Eternal Father can take pride. How handsome is a young man who is well groomed. He is a son of God, deemed worthy of holding the holy priesthood of God. He does not need tattoos or earrings on or in his body. The First Presidency and the Quorum of the Twelve are all united in counseling against these things.

And while I speak of such matters I want to give emphasis again to the matter of pornography. It has become a 10 billion dollar industry in the United States, where a few men grow rich at the expense of thousands upon thousands who are their victims. Stay away from it. It is exciting, but it will destroy you. It will warp your senses. It will build within you an appetite that you will do anything to appease. And don’t try to create associations through the Internet and chat rooms. They can lead you down into the very abyss of sorrow and bitterness.

I must also say a word concerning illicit drugs. You know how I feel about them. I don’t care what the variety may be. They will destroy you if pursued. You will become their slave. Once in their power, you will do anything to get money to buy more.

I was amazed while watching a television program to learn that parents introduced drugs to their children in 20 percent of the cases. I cannot understand what I regard as the stupidity of these parents. What future other than slavery for their children could they see in them? Illegal drugs will utterly destroy those who become addicted to them.

My advice, my pleading to you wonderful young men and women, is to stay entirely away from them. You don’t need to experiment with them. Look about you and see the effects they have had on others. There is no need for any Latter-day Saint boy or girl, young man or young woman, to even try them. Stay clean from these mind-altering and habit-forming addictions.

And now just a word on the most common and most difficult of all problems for you young men and young women to handle. It is the relationship that you have one with another. You are dealing with the most powerful of human instincts. Only the will to live possibly exceeds it.

The Lord has made us attractive one to another for a great purpose. But this very attraction becomes as a powder keg unless it is kept under control. It is beautiful when handled in the right way. It is deadly if it gets out of hand.

It is for this reason that the Church counsels against early dating. This rule is not designed to hurt you in any way. It is designed to help you, and it will do so if you will observe it.

Steady dating at an early age leads so often to tragedy. Studies have shown that the longer a boy and girl date one another, the more likely they are to get into trouble.

It is better, my friends, to date a variety of companions until you are ready to marry. Have a wonderful time, but stay away from familiarity. Keep your hands to yourself. It may not be easy, but it is possible.

You young men who plan to go on missions must recognize that sexual sin may keep you from that opportunity. You may think that you can hide it. Long experience has shown that you cannot. To serve an effective mission you must have the Spirit of the Lord, and truth withheld does not mix with that Spirit. Sooner or later you will feel compelled to confess your earlier transgressions. Well did Sir Galahad say, “My strength is as the strength of ten, because my heart is pure” (Alfred, Lord Tennyson, Sir Galahad [1842], st. 1).

My dear young friends, in matters of sex you know what is right. You know when you are walking on dangerous ground, when it is so easy to stumble and slide into the pit of transgression. I plead with you to be careful, to stand safely back from the cliff of sin over which it is so easy to fall. Keep yourselves clean from the dark and disappointing evil of sexual transgression. Walk in the sunlight of that peace which comes from obedience to the commandments of the Lord.

Now, if there be any who have stepped over the line, who may already have transgressed, is there any hope for you? Of course there is. Where there is true repentance, there will be forgiveness. That process begins with prayer. The Lord has said, “He who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more” (D&C 58:42). Share your burden with your parents if you can. And by all means, confess to your bishop, who stands ready to help you.

The brain brain brain

An amazing thing about walking to work, is the chance I get to think.  My brain is constantly going, but it's nice not being interrupted.  In fact, I'm extremely easy to scare because I'm constantly within myself thinking about things.  I don't like to overthink and I enjoy vegging out in front of Challenge as much as the next person.  I believe our brains need breaks but not so much that we become more dumb.  I often feel like I'm getting stupider and stupider the longer I prolong going back to college.  Working in a deli doesn't help boost my confidence in my brain either.

And I absolutely love those moments of enlightenment.  The moment where you think about things and all the possibilities and effects it has and after exhausting all options, your solid viewpoint on it reveals itself.  For example, my view on divorce has vastly changed.  I always thought that divorce was NOT an option at all, no matter what, til the end of time stay with that person.  With recent events I have forced myself to reconsider.  My mom has remarried 3 times and I literally cannot imagine the specifics of what my life would be like if she had stayed with my dad.  I believe that everything happens for a reason and we can never possibly comprehend the impact each decision will have on our future and the lives of those around us.  I am still very hesitant when it comes to divorce, although my mind has opened up to the possibility that it is in fact a necessity for some to be happy and learn the things they are meant to learn in life.  I believe in fighting your hardest for marriage and I still think divorce is a selfish thing to do in lots of situations, but I have gotten to the point where I no longer judge those that get divorced.  Yes I admit it.  When someone would explain the situation of their divorce to me I would silently ridicule (I'm not completely awful, I'd still feel bad for the divorced).  A lot inside of me has changed though.  I'd like to think so at least.  My mind...my brain...has been broadened and I am grateful for it.

Hitting rock bottom

Sometimes you need to hit rock bottom to know what you really want.

What you really need to work on.

What you have to do.

I'm grateful for that.

We've all been there.

If not...you'll get there soon enough.

And all I can say for you is to get perspective to learn what you need so you can become so much more.

Things to look forward to!

I'm taking my little sister Kari to Eisley this Saturday and I CANNOT WAIT!!!!  I just looked up their new stuff and this song is my favorite so far.

Phone Apps

This is the dumbest game/app I've ever seen in my life.

That's right.  I hate Angry Birds.  Judge me.  When I first heard about it and saw Clifton playing it I laughed my butt off.  I admit, the storyline and creativity is hilarious.  The first time I played it I sucked way bad.  I kept trying and I still sucked.  Obviously I hate the game now.  I don't understand how it became the most popular game on the planet either.  It always annoys me when small things suddenly become famous seemingly overnight.  Same thing happened with the Twilight books.  I read that book when it first came out and I could not wait for the second book.  I recommended it to all of my friends in high school and they scoffed.  Years later what happens?  Those same friends are raving about the book to me!  How dare they!  The amount of fame given to those books nearly ruined it for me and I am kind of ashamed to say I love Twilight, even though I did love it first.  I know, I'm pathetic.  Aside from that. 

Here's a game I LOVE:

Kind of the same concept of Angry Birds, but much better.

Next:

Yep, I'm a total sucker for horoscopes.  I think horoscopes fit people in a general way just like fortune cookies or something like that, but I believe there can be really great advice and wisdom in what is said.  There have been a few times when I'll read my horoscope and it explains a situation I'm going through.  I take the advice to heart and learn what I can from it in my own personal life and in my own unique way.  I believe the same thing for dream meanings.  Oh man the depth that can be recieved from dream symbols!  It's all up to us individually to apply in our own lives and if it doesn't make sense then disregard it or look closer.  Most of the time I find these things very intrigeing so I find this app wonderful.

To all you runners:

Not only does this app track your distance, but it tracks your maximum elevation as well as minimum elevation, elevation gain/loss, average speed, max speed, total time, AND moving time.  No big deal.  Yeah it's amazing, I use it every time I run.

Another favorite of mine:

Mr. Financisto here keeps me tracking my purchases so I don't go into the negative.  It also budgets and shows you your monthly spending habits.  As of now here's mine since I got the app in March:

House:  1680.96

Debt:  929.80

Monthly Bills:  836.12

Pleasure:  410.15

Food:  365.35

Races:  182.00

Since I don't think you know enough personal info about me now, here's another:

My first year in college I felt moody so I kept track of my moods and significant events on my calender.  It was simple enough.  Smiley face on happy days, frowny face on sad days, and lips for when I was kissed.  I figured if there were more than two frowns a week for no real reason I needed to make a more conscious effort to be happy.  I'm just weird and love keeping track of things like that, so obviously I love keeping track of my period and when I make love with my husband.  This one even gives a forecast on fertility and ovulating cycles.  I'm so glad I have this app so I can get a better idea of...well just everything I need to have a good feel for.

Next:

Tv Shows Stream.  The inspiration for this post.  We don't have internet, and I don't have a car so it's hard to keep up on favorite shows such as Greys and Glee and Smallville.  My phone has internet but it's extremely difficult watching shows.  Although I have never been much of a TV watcher, I am grateful for this outstanding app.

Pumpkins vs Monsters:

Here's the rules:

1.  Clifton cannot talk to me when I play this

2.  I have to tell Clifton when I play this game so he doesn't try to talk to me and doesn't get hurt when I don't reply

3.  I can't play this before anything like family events, walking around walmart, going to the dog park, etc.

4.  Having a fan around while playing this game is recommended

I get so into this game.  It always makes me flustered hence rule number three.  It makes me mad a lot too.  Try it sometime.

And lastly:

Wikidroid.  If I don't know the answer I look it up.  I love learning about things and making my brain nice and wrinkly.  Especially since I'm not going to college I need all the help I can get.

Today I'm grateful for apps.  Maybe you'll be grateful for my favorites too!

Unsolicited Advice

It's hard learning lessons sometimes.  I'm grateful for it, but it's still hard.  I think the biggest part of learning lessons is realizing that something I said or did hurt someone so bad that I need to really work on changing it, especially when no harm was meant; or that I'm really not doing as well as I thought.  I know that I can't please everyone and I accept that fact on most days.  I am someone that needs people to tell me when I'm being rude or selfish or moody or some other negative attribute.  If people don't tell me I don't realize it and I therefore can't change it.  I've already mentioned that I will always have to keep my moods in check.  It's not something that will permanently change, but it is something I can keep in control and moderation so I don't hurt those around me as well as myself.  Today I really learned how important it is for me to keep my mouth shut.
I am a strong believer in just being real.  Getting to the point, saying things how they are, no bending the truth or reading between the lines.  It's extremely frustrating for me when adults play mind games or dance around the real issue.  A friend of mine is in a management position and when another mutual friend asked to be hired, he told her a few different reasons.  All of the reasons were true but contradicting to how he hired other people.  The actual reason was that he didn't want to hire her and he told me that he didn't.  She would've been fine and accepted that but she sensed he wasn't being entirely honest and that was what she had a problem with.  I believe that people can sense when someone else is being dishonest.  I believe people can sense genuity.  It's a lot harder as adults to sense but it's something I think our spirits can definitely detect.  No one likes dishonesty in any of it's forms and I'd say that hurt feelings or being angry about something is about 75% because our souls can feel the dishonesty.  I don't think my friend meant to hide the real reason.  He is so kind and tries so hard not to be rude and he succeeds; in succeeding he fails.  He thought telling her flat out would've been hard for her, but it's harder to deal with the sugar coated truth.  I'm not bashing his ways because he is a wonderful person.  I want you to understand how important being completely truthful is to me.  Not everyone can handle it though and that's something I need to remember.

Me and my sister are in a fight right now because of the whole family pictures dealio.  You know, the day where Kristin went crazy?  Maybe I went crazy.  Probably.   A few days ago she called me and we talked but then we started fighting.  She doesn't want to be a pushover and because of that she is being a bully.  I don't know what happened that made her feel this way, but she feels very taken advantage of...by pretty much everyone.  She's had a lot of anger building up inside of her and when we spoke she brought up things that have happened in the past that she has been angry about.  She is trying to make a positive change in her life which is great.  I was frustrated with the things she brought up, because they are things she didn't even look upset about; in fact they are things her and I bonded over.  Clearly my point of view is distorted and everyday conversation can be very upsetting to unhappy people.  I have been very upset about the things she said and finally got ahold of myself today and realized what needed to be done.

Not too long ago I was reading myinfertilelifeunedited.blogspot.com, and she was talking about a recent appointment she went to.  She has been struggling with infertility for SEVEN years and after briefly chatting with a lady next to her in the waiting room the lady said to her "just relax and you'll get pregnant."  She has never had an actual period.  Her body is physically incapable of being pregnant without treatments and pills and even then it is extremely difficult.  It's not something that will happen just by relaxing and she wanted to yell at the lady for saying so.  At the end of her post she said this:

"Unsolicited advice, no matter how well-intended, is never welcome."

I now fully agree with her.  I have given my sister advice and told her she just needs to relax and that it's pointless to hold onto anger, especially when I've sincerely apologized multiple times.  Kristin did not like me telling her how to live her life as if mine was so much better.  That's not at all what I had intended but in all reality that is what I was doing, whether it was knowingly or not. 

From here on out, I need to keep my mouth shut.  Not everyone is like me and needs things to be said as straightforward as possible.  It's what makes people beautiful and unique--our differences.  I hate not being able to say how I feel when I feel it, because that makes me feel fake and I hate that.  But if it's not something that will make the person feel better about their life and relationships it will always do more harm than good.  That's not worth losing family over.

I am grateful for the lesson that I learned this week and especially today.  I was really struggling with the things that were happening with Kristin and I needed counsel from my mom.  Before I could get that counsel I realized what needed to be done and that's exactly what.  I am the problem.  As hard as that is for me to accept it has been accepted and I will embrace the beautiful unsolicited advice I recieved while reading myinfertilelifeunedited.

Hiking

Don't you love feeling yourself get stronger?  I am feeling that with my lungs.  I have been hiking nonstop and I know my lungs are getting so strong.  I went hiking with my sister today and she was having a really hard time after half an hour, while I was prepared to continue going another hour or two.  It really has nothing to do with being in shape.  It has everything to do with practice.  How do you get better at playing piano?  Practice.  How do you get better at soccer?  Practice.  How do you get better at painting?  Practice.  How do you get better at hiking?  Practice.  I am a strong believer in the power of practice.  I love being able to explore wherever I want to.  The mountains are just a giant playground for a big kid! 

I've said it before, I'll say it a thousand more times.  There is something about being outside and being in nature that brings a peace of mind and a closeness to God that you can't feel many other places.

Today, I am grateful for hiking and the joy it brings me pretty much every day.

Friday the 13th

Are you superstitious?  I'm not.  But there's something to be said for all the oddities that happened today. 

1.  I put on a glove that had a 6th finger hole.  Twice. 

2.  Then I jumped onto a rope swing and 1 1/2 swings later it broke.  I fell on my bum bum (definitely my favorite way of saying butt...tooshy is funny too) and may or may not have been laughing hysterically for a few minutes.  I wish other people would laugh more at things like that.  I wish I could've seen it, because I would've been laughing so hard--although I was hysterical already so I guess it doesn't matter.  I'm just a bad person that laughs at other people when they fall ok?  I always have been.  Yes, it's gotten me into lots of trouble growing up.

3.  During a brilliant game of sardines I hid under a picnic table.  Multiple people passed me and looked under the table.  Someone looked directly at me.  Thirty minutes later I get a text saying everyone gave up.  Obviously I have the ability to become invisible on demand.  Beware.

I'm still not a superstitious person but I love friday the 13th and the bizarre things that can happen.  Plus it's a riot watching how other people react to the cursed day.

Mountains

When I was young and I saw my first Paramount Pictures video, I thought the mountain was my mountain--Ben Lomond Mountain.

Paramount vs. Ben Lomond

I did not take this picture.  My computer is broken therefore I have no pictures that aren't  already on my deleted facebook or cds.

You may think I was delusional but ever since I was little I have believed that Paramount Pictures was the Ben Lomond Mountain.  Blame my siblings, they made me believe that big fat lie.  More specifically, probably Shane or Aaron.  Anyways me and Clifton were talking about it the other night and...I can't remember what he said about it actually.  So I looked it up like I always do.  I'm obsessed with finding answers and educating myself since I'm not in college.  I feel like there's a stereotype against people in their 20's that work at sandwich shops and don't go to college.  Plus I feel myself getting less intelligent.  And you never know when these random factoids will help you win on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire".  Go ahead and laugh, we'll see who has the most money at the end of the game show. 

Apparently, the guy who designed the Paramount Pictures logo was in fact inspired by our beautiful North Ogden mountain.  Don't believe me?  Fine see for yourself.

Our mountains are so beautiful and I'm so grateful to have them.  Especially so close!  I walk 2 blocks and they are there to keep me entertained on fun adventures.

Wednesday

Wednesday has always been my favorite day ya know :].

Dishwashers

I've grown to enjoy washing the dishes by hand as long as someone is talking to me.  But man oh man is it nice having a dishwasher that works.

Crazyness

I am grateful for crazyness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!jha dfsiuyw8oiet gquekhrbv ,mnzdymg6iuaebzxnjR~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ :LADsj fl;aj hfkgkq3jb6t!?CV>cv;.lzkdcfbijhu



That's right.

WOMANS day

I am grateful for Mothers Day.  Ever since my friend Stephanie has made me more aware of infertility, I have looked at mothers day differently.  I wish people wouldn't put such emphasis on the mother part.  I feel like it is a day to celebrate womanhood, not motherhood.  Because woman are naturally more caring and instinctive mothers to people they come across regardless of whether they have kids or not.  It bothers me a little when in church, people say prayers saying things about the moms having a good day because not everyone is a physical mom.  Although I know people don't do this intentionally to hurt peoples feelings, it would be nice for people to stop and think about what they are saying and to actually realize that there are so many women in this world that struggle with the hardships of infertility.  I'll be honest, I didn't even realize until either last year or the year before.  I'm not saying I'm better than anyone else, but it's been a wonderful lesson for me to learn and I feel like it's something I needed to learn.  That actually makes me a little afraid that I may have trouble conceiving, and the Lord is preparing me now.  Nine months of newlyweddom, no birth control, and no condoms.  Infertile?  Dumb?  Possibly.  Of course, I'm a believer that if I was meant to be pregnant I would be pregnant no matter the situation.  How often do people get pregnant while on the pill?  A lot more than should.  The way I see it, God will not give me a child when I am not ready.  I am not saying those without kids are not ready.  Definitely not what I'm getting at.  I just think even if I was on birth control, if God needed me to have a child He would not let the birth control stop anything.  I believe everything happens for a reason.  Perhaps this infertility education was to help me when I try to conceive, or perhaps it's just so that I may be more sensitive to the things I say in general.  I won't know until I am older and see things as they unravel.  Until then:

"I hope we can all find joy, in one way or another, in motherhood today. Be it through gratitude for our own mothers, through hope and faith in being a mother some day, through love for children who have passed, or through being a mother right now." -myspoiledeggs

I also really like what was said on the Infertile Life Unedited blog.  She said what I want to perfectly.  Now you may know or you may not, but Cliftons sister Catherine has been struggling with infertility for 4 years.  I can't remember exactly what is wrong, but I know she has to take 3 pills for different things.  One to keep her hormone balance, one to not attack the sperm, and one to produce...something like that.  Her chances of getting pregnant are so low.  She took a year off because the stress and sadness was just too overwhelming but recently started taking the pills again and trying to have a baby.  A few months ago she got the swine flu, no joke.  It was a huge pain and I didn't see her for at least a month.  On Easter she found out she was pregnant, and she told the family tonight.  Apparently her body was busy attacking the swine flu that it didn't have any time to fight the sperm and she was able to get pregnant.  God is a genius I am telling you.  I started crying I was so happy for her.

Along with that, mom LOVED her photobook!  As soon as she saw the cover she dropped it and started crying into her hands.  I did good :) and that's a great feeling.  I love my mom.  We have had a lot of disagreements and we've never been close, but I'm grateful for the lessons she's taught me.  The older I am getting, the closer her and I get and I like that.  I see her as a friend now instead of the enemy trying to ruin my life :P.  It was a great today and I am glad I'm a woman.  Happy WOMANS day!!!!

Walmart

Walmart is something I constantly battle.  I do not like how Walmart will move into a city/town/village with the lowest prices, put everyone out of business, then raise the prices to ridiculous amounts.  I understand and it's a great business strategy.  It makes me sad for the independent business owners because that's what makes a town unique besides the people.  I believe in supporting the independently owned businesses.  I choose Wendys over McDonalds, and Smiths over Walmart.  Perhaps that is not the wisest financially but the prices are not that different.  It's hard shopping at Smiths for the sole reason that they are not open all night.  I don't have a car and do not want to carry groceries 3 miles.  I work during the day, and when I get home Clifton is already gone and he gets off at 11.  So on nights like tonight I am grateful for Walmart so I can get some food.  I do like how they are lowering their prices and adding more variety though.  That's how it was initially, but they've gotten too...lazy? over the years and they're paying for it now.

Birthday parties

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHANE!!!!!!!!
(tomorrow)

Fringe

I feel so silly posting things like this, but I am grateful for Fringe today.  So much better than X-Files!  You should watch it.  It's so funny.

Kaisha Cragun

Today I'm grateful for Kaisha.She is so awesome!We both went to apply for a job in Salt Lake with a previous manager and it was wonderful catching up.I haven't seen her in so long!And really there is no excuse.We agree on so many things and we have a lot in common.I love being crazy and she is good at doing that.It's refreshing being around someone that really just doesn't care what others think.We went to Krispy Kreme afterwards and it was delicious.I told her my side of the whole story with the Christian (Friend F) thing.I haven't told anyone else besides Clifton because most all the group has formed their opinion.I think it's pointless to tell my side of the story to people too close-minded to realize that Christian was listening to only what she wanted to hear and not what I was saying to her.I don't think people should have to take sides and I wasn't asking that of Kaisha at all.Me and Christian are no longer friends for very good reasons and it was a relief to have someone to talk to.For the most part I have accepted that people will form an uneducated opinion after hearing only one side, but it has been irritating in this situtation.I don't want certain people to think certain things of me and I'm sure they do now because of what she has told them, and although I have accepted that it has been bothersome.Trust me I know I've done wrong in this situtation as well, but it has been over for quite awhile now.The only reason I bring it up now, is to let you know how grateful I am to Kaisha for listening to me.That's really all I needed.She is a great listener.And I don't think people give her enough credit on how wise she is.

After getting back from Salt Lake and Krispy Kreme, we went to Zeppe's to visit one of her friends.There was an awesome area behind where we took some pictures together.Hopefully she will send them to me soon!It was just so nice getting to know her bettter.I love Kaisha for who she is.